Thursday, June 28, 2012

I'm Not Ready!!!!

I'm trying to pack.. been trying all day but I don't feel ready. I dreamed last night I got all the way to Covington and left something crucial behind... like my passport.  And my carryon bag.  grrr... I'm shaking, but that could be coldness. I may not ever sleep tonight.

So right now I'm trying to dispel a little nervous energy by writing rather frantically.

I've been chatting with someone who may or may not just be teasing me.  I hope not. I'd feel really stupid.

I'm listening to samples from the new Johnny Hates Jazz album and wondering which of the songs Clark Datchler was referring to when he told me there would be some uplifting songs on the album that weren't purely love songs.  I was in a bit of a snit when I told him I was sick and tired of gooey love songs with my disappointing love life.  Well, it's true.  It made me feel better when he told me that.  I wish he would get back on Twitter -- he's hilarious!  Sounds like maybe Eternal and Lighthouse might be the ones he referred to?  I dunno, they're just samples so far.  It's nice that soooome people respond to their tweets.

So I'm waiting breathlessly for new albums from Johnny Hates Jazz and Adam Ant.  Yeah, the same thing applies about Clark Datchler as Adam Ant.  LOL  Shhh... don't tell on me!  Well, you could tell either of THEM, but I doubt either would come running to meet me.

I got a nasty sunburn on Saturday.  Yesterday came the huge blisters in a patch the size of my palm (ooh, lucky me for having small hands, eh?).  Then the skin came off.  Itches maddeningly.  Dad doctored me up with copious amounts of Neosporin tonight when I dropped my dog off.   He said he thinks I might have a new layer of skin grown over the raw places by maybe tomorrow night.  I hope... this is gross and disgusting and itches constantly.  Dad cried when I left.  Kind of casts a pall over my trip.  Of course I'm coming back! And he better be here when I do.  Could he have been upset about what happened to my back?

By the way, if you are the praying type, I'd appreciate a prayer for my skin to grow back in the next couple of days.  My immune system freaked out with the sunburn and made it all worse.

Is it any surprise that I would want to see other places in the world, when this town has never held more for me than sadness?  I don't think I'll find happiness on another continent, but I need to broaden my horizons.  I need some inspiration.  I need a reason to go ooooonnnn.... Sorry, did I wax a bit melodramatic then?

I just don't want to live with regrets I can avoid.  And I want to see some beautiful things, being as my life lacks beauty.  *sigh*  That part is true.  And it might be even partially my fault.  As to the rest of the fault, it would be an amalgamation of people I've known and it's pointless to blame anybody else anyway.

Shaking... okay, that's nerves.  Anticipation.  I do the same before a first date too.  Sometimes every date.  LOL

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