Saturday, October 20, 2012

2nd 5k Finished

Well, I did it. I ran in my second 5k and finished dead last. :). No, I'm not happy about it, but it is kinda funny. I'm the one who made sure nobody else had to come in last. It's probably going to provide some catty people with great fuel for insulting me behind my back. Or even to my face. Screw them anyway.

Energy wasn't the problem, although I started out way too fast, just trying to keep up with everyone else. I couldn't catch my breath. I injured my hip before I hit the halfway point. I'm lying down with ice on it and ibuprofen attempting to help it.

Now I don't want you to think that's an excuse for such a poor showing. The fact is, they were just faster than me. Better shape, of course, that's understood. It's difficult to run fast when you are in poor shape.

I'm 40 pounds overweight. I'm not in shape to do more than finish, though I was hoping there would be a few people less prepared than me who would finish behind me. Is that bad of me?

I'm still not sure what was with the two in front of me wearing Halloween costumes. Crayon red hair (maybe a wig?), crazy mismatched socks, and a long black cape.

You know you're doing poorly when the truck with flashing blue lights that is there to monitor the runners from the back passes you and stays ahead of you for most of the race. That made me think they were impatient for the stragglers to hurry up, and it made me feel absolutely defeated after the first half mile.

Then I saw traffic getting backed up along the route, though one lady did cheer at me while she was waiting. :).

Still, I couldn't help feeling by the halfway point that I was inconveniencing half of the town.

When I finally did turn back onto the block toward the finish line, I saw all of those people waiting for me to hurry up and get my slow self across the finish line, and it made me want to give up right there. However, a few people did cheer for me as I finished and that took some of the sting away. Some. Lol

My hair, apparently, was bulletproof today. It stayed EXACTLY as I had put it up. I guess I found the perfect combination of barrettes, hair gel, and hairspray to make it a non-factor of aggravation. Running tights and a t-shirt were warm enough for 52 degrees and 10 mph winds, fortunately. No irritation from tugging my bunching shorts because I wore the tights. They didn't slip down on me like I had worried, but I was wearing cotton underwear so that they would be less likely to slide.

Had my shoes just right and didn't have to think about how I was planting my feet. I just let my natural gait take over. I did manage to get gel all over the side of my shirt, but nobody seemed to notice.

My new UnderArmour running bra worked great, once I tightened the rib band enough (as tight as it would go -- I may drop a size before long). On that, I actually get to make it the smallest band size and it fits. Yay for not straining the size. Betcha if I ran in that with no shirt, I could seriously outdo some of the other ladies lol. (It's actually a nice enough looking bra that it could be a running top by itself.) I think a small bosom is extremely helpful for being a fast runner. But I'd win the wet t-shirt contest. Yep.

I was barely "there" as it was. A few students said hi, a couple of adults said hi, and for the most part, I played with my phone to hide how nervous I was about being alone in the crowd with nobody to talk to. I didn't win a door prize, but it seemed like poor sportsmanship for me to just leave while they were giving out prizes to the winners, so I stayed.

I played on my phone, geek that I am. I was really uncomfortable there by myself, but what could I do about it anyway?

I don't know if I'm due for a round of intensified shin splints. Gosh, I hope not. I'm trying to not favor my right hip, but every step I take makes me wince. I can hear what a doctor would say: "As heavy as you are, you should know better than to try to run."

And I have realized, finally, that running is the only exercise that actually makes me lose weight. So it seems that I will just have to accept my two steps forward, one step back method of weight-loss-by-running.

*sigh*. I just weighed myself. Apparently I gained four pounds this week because I couldn't run. Either that, or my attempts to stay hydrated did their usual damage and I'm retaining fluid. I wonder if that had any bearing on my sluggishness this morning. You see, my self-confidence is extremely fickle and relies on infusions of good things happening to me in order to have any decent self-esteem. This week has effectively been shot to hell.

On the brighter side, my Nike app tells me that was my fastest 5k ever, and it is nearly four minutes faster than my time on my previous race. I ran the first mile in 12:38. Not bad, but that pace was too much for me to maintain and it wore me out fast.

I'm going to go take a nice warm shower and hope it helps me with my coughing. :) And then I'm going to try to get a consolation snuggle from my dog. I may have to bribe him.

Despite my phony upbeat attitude about all this, I'm getting depressed. That may be physiological, but it will shock no one if I admit a big part of it is psychological. It's 4:34 pm. I think I'm gonna write this day off and go to sleep. I'll see you on Sunday.

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