Saturday, October 27, 2012

Oh My Freakin' Toe!

My legs have finally stopped hurting... So much. Lol. Actually, the reason I'm still off my feet isn't my lower legs. It's my foot. The tendon over my big toe is still so swollen and tender that it looks like the next toe has a serious depression sunken into it.

Oh, did I fail to mention how accident prone I am? In this case, my clumsiness isn't to blame, however. As I was setting down the heating pad I bought to use on my hip last Sunday, a 15-pound stoneware pan decided to kamikaze, corner down, on top of my foot.

Yeah, ouch.

It's been so swollen, bruised, and sore that I can't wear my running shoes. Too much pressure on the big toe tendon. I think I was lucky not to actually break my toe, but bending that sucker upwards still hurts pretty badly.

Yeah, I know, poor baby. It'll heal like everything else does. But I'm getting a little impatient.

Stuck in the starting gate by a dodgy hip and a busted toe! Well, the weak hip flexors should explain a few things to some people, such as why I was never able to do a roundhouse kick in karate. And a few other things. Lol

43 marathons in 51 days. Eddie Izzard, a comedian and actor with no prior experience in long distance running, and not at the peak of fitness, ran 43 marathons in 51 days with just five weeks of training immediately before that.

He did it for Sport Relief in the UK, and ran a total of 1100 miles in that time.

Despite rain, cold, killer drivers on busy roads with no shoulder, losing toenails, a weird gait, and extreme blisters, his daily injuries didn't stop him from completing every single run. It is recommended to take a month of rest after a marathon. He took one rest day a week after six days of marathons. And he's 47 years old.

Wow. I'm thoroughly impressed. And disgusted with myself that I'm such a recurrent failure. If he can do that, why can't I do the little bit I'm trying to accomplish? Well, he did have support. A small crew of people including a sports therapist.

Me? I've got people asking about my race time and saying "at least you finished" and asking why I haven't become instantly thin since I've started running. No questions about the training program I'm using, or anything else. Not interested in the process, just demanding excellent and immediate results.

I've heard it all before. I've even been grounded for six weeks after making a B on a weekly quiz instead of an A. (I missed one question on a ten-question quiz, if you were wondering.). Oh, not just grounded. That wasn't enough, was it? Sentenced to clean the bathroom every day on my hands and knees, specifically on that ceramic tile floor. And not once any help offered in studying for a single test so that I could make an A.

But I guess I deserved such a severe double punishment for that B, only discovered after someone went snooping in a note one of my friends had written me. I'm sure EVERY parent who loves their child does that to them, right?

I remember a specific voiced disappointment that my sister and I weren't the valedictorian and salutatorian of our graduating class. Considering that I'm a year younger, was I supposed to not only skip a grade but become second in the class simultaneously? Or at least first in my own class?

All the while complaining LOUDLY over the once-yearly request for a poster board to complete a class project. (Subtext: stop bothering me to help you once a year by taking you to buy school supplies.) I think they cost, what, 15 cents when I was in high school? Every year the same complaint, aren't we too OLD to be doing projects in school? I guess I was supposed to be wildly successful despite all of the deliberate obstacles being continually put in front of me.

So... Extreme results expected with ZERO actual support. Talk about being a self-made person. It seems I continue to be a disappointment. I hear about it all the time.

Well, maybe if I had been able to focus on my schoolwork instead of having to hold a job all that time, I could have done better, hmm? Unfortunately, 3:15-3:45 each day before work was NOT enough time to do a fantastic job with high school homework.

So it's probably no wonder that every setback in running makes me lose heart and faith that I can do any better.

I've got another new running book that supposedly tells why you should take a substantial amount of time off from racing after your last race disaster, but of course, I can't find it. *sigh*. I'm not sure if I'm going to run next month in the one I ran last year. I just don't think I'll do more than be a dismal failure. Again.

To say that I need a trainer is a vast understatement. But I need one that understands the point of all this is for me to become a light and lean runner, rather than a short stocky woman. I don't know that anybody local even knows how to do that for me.

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