Sunday, January 20, 2013

Reality and Imagination

Last night I dreamed I finished a half marathon. Strong finish, hands up, smile for the camera, all that. Except I don't believe there was any camera, because it seemed to be a typical low-rent local event put on merely to collect cash. They did give me a finisher's medal, though it was a cheap looking hunk of metal. Lol

The amusing part was that I was about to lose my right shoe coming across the finish line, and I probably looked rather goofy trying to keep it on. In reality, that's not what will happen -- my piriformis muscle will pinch my sciatic nerve and I'll end up dragging my right leg across the finish. I knew this even while I was dreaming it.

Well, it's better than the dream the night before, when I was carrying a severed head in my left hand, everywhere I went. People acted like there was really something wrong with that. Hahaha. I don't know whose head it was or even who did the deed. I just knew that I had to carry it and it was making people avoid me. That's probably the point of the dream -- a demonstration of why people avoid me -- like I'm carrying an invisible severed head all the time.

Aw come on, I've never actually wanted to hurt anybody, let alone deal with the goriness of severing a head. It's just my mental version of Jacob Marley's chains. An albatross for the feelings I can't Ignore. I woke up with a bad headache yesterday -- it could have been my own head I was carrying around.

Maybe I could go to the gym today and get back to my running. I think the bronchial swelling has gone down, because only a little light coughing remains. I don't feel dizzy and lightheaded today, so yayyyyy. Finished my antibiotics so the insomnia is gone. Any hope of doing well in the upcoming race is gone, ha ha.

But that's okay. I'm still just a beginner in running. When it stops being a parade of pain and injury, then I'll be able to do more. My ankles tell the tale. They are pretty sculpted now, and don't crackle when I try to run. It takes a while for everything to start to come together, especially if you weren't built like a skinny boy to begin with. :) Much easier for those who naturally are, of course.

Three day weekends could be such a wonderful thing if I had anything happier to do than sit here by myself. I'm sure my dog would argue that the opportunity to give him lengthy belly rubs is reward in itself.

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