Monday, December 23, 2013

Learned, Part 3

A really nice thick terry cloth robe is worth the money if you love lounging in it whether you're fresh out of the shower, recently awakened, or home from work and needing an extra snuggle over your clothes for a nap on the couch.  Matching (fake) sheepskin slippers are pretty fabulous too.  Go on.  You deserve a cuddly robe and slippers, for the first time in your life.

Jojoba oil is a great overnight hair conditioner, but you really don't want to be called for a ride to the emergency room that night, you greaseball looking thing.  People will think you never wash your hair, instead of realizing you're taking exceptionally good care of your hair that night. Timing and clairvoyance are everything.

Sometimes it's better not to answer the phone, if you know the caller is going to ruin your night.

Christmas eventually degrades from thoughtful gifts, to gift card trading, to an exchange of plain old cash because people don't want to be bothered with shopping for another person.  

Cortisone shots will really mess with your cycle, in more than one way. Do the research, because the doctors haven't figured this out yet and it's icky to talk about. Cortisone messes with estrogen levels.  Hmmm...

Sometimes you just can't rescue that scorched pot.  *sigh* Be happy about your nineteen years together and meet some new cookware. And understand that your new cookware will have a huge gooey sticker attached that will NOT come off!

A sturdy metal coatrack makes a great pot rack when you have nowhere to put a real pot rack... Or all of your new pots. Leather shoelaces make great hanging loops for your pots and pans when the hanging holes won't accommodate your coat rack... I mean pot rack's hooks.  :)

There's always someone who will twist your words to deliberately make a complete stranger angry at you.  The stranger will be dumb enough to fall for it, like you were.  You may never understand why they did it, but knowing that person is a manipulator gives you the measure of his character.  Seeing how he or she treats someone else will show how that person will treat you.  

There is not "someone for everyone" unless you are talking about a worldwide average.  Some people take multiple servings of cake, and leave nothing for others.  Some people were never allowed to have any cake, and say that the crumbs are all they need to be forever happy.  But you know they wanted some cake too, so don't go on and on about how fabulous your cake is, right in their face all the time.

Using my stand mixer makes for less cleanup time when I'm doing a lot of baking.  It has one bowl and one large beater, so I wash it after every use to be ready for the next use, and I have a lot smaller mess to clean up.  :). And oh yes, the KitchenAid was worth the price. :)

People say that you can't be loved by someone else until you love yourself, but they refuse to understand that sometimes you need someone else to prove that you are worth loving.  For half of us, it's the lonely flip side.  I think it's easier to be stuck on yourself, actually, and it shows a lack of humility and compassion for others. People who are happy are often too willing to feel superior to those who are not.

A pound of butter costs a dollar more if you buy it as 8 half sticks, rather than 4 regular sticks.  Holy cow, that's ridiculous!

There are recipes out there for eggless cookie dough, able to be eaten raw without fear of raw eggs.  And of course, there are warnings about eating raw flour.  *sigh*. I've eaten raw cookie dough all my life, and I used to put raw eggs in my peanut butter breakfast milkshake before school in high school, and I've never gotten sick from that.  The one time I got salmonella was from a can of Campbell's chicken noodle soup, properly heated.

Doctors are bribed by product reps to recommend certain blood glucose meters and supplies.  You'll need their prescription to buy the test strips, which will cost double or triple the price of the ones you can buy without a prescription. The cheaper, no-prescription-required meters and strips will do the same job as an expensive meter.  I lost a lot of respect for my doctor when I realized this. The fact that he was influenced by someone without a stake in my health or finances really bothers me. That, and the fact that he can no longer get my name or health issues right even with my file in his hand caused me to drop him.

Blue cheese stuffed olives will not do when you want almond stuffed olives. :(

It's possible that one batch of red velvet truffles could take all day to make.  And you should reduce the oil in the recipe while you add cocoa powder to it.  You can reduce a cake to crumbs with a decent stand mixer.  :)

Providing someone the cash they requested for a gift takes all the fun out of giving them a gift. It's easier, but no fun.  Boo. 

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