Saturday, April 26, 2014

41 Thoughts on the New Jo-Ann's Store

Thoughts on learning my town is getting a Jo-Ann's... I was driving by the mall on April 1st, and saw a sign announcing a Jo-Ann Fabric and Crafts store arriving in the summer of 2014.  I thought I was hallucinating. If you know me, you know how I feel about making things. :) it's almost a compulsion to make a mark on my world with handmades. And my little drying-up hometown has been steadily stamping out and discouraging all creativity since I moved back fourteen years ago.

1. This is an April Fool's joke... It's April Fool's Day, and there's the sign.  Really, not in my dying little town.
2.  Where are they putting it? The mall?  There are no store spaces big enough to have a decent sized Jo-Ann's. Aww, it's gonna be tiny, and it'll suck, sales will suck, and it'll close in a year.  :(
3.  It's not a joke.  Other people have seen actual construction going on in the mall.  SQUEE!
4.  OMG! It's opening this summer! I'll get to spend all summer making stuff!
5.  I'm going to start sewing again! Gonna make m'self all kinds of cute outfits.
6.  Baby quilts! I'll make baby quilts too!
7. Wait a minute.  I forgot I can't have kids.  
8.  I have to wait for great nieces and great nephews to come along... In ten years or so.  
9.  What will Wal-Mart, with their recently returned abysmal craft and low-quality fabric department, do? Take the creative stuff out completely again? But... But.... No.... Please? 
10.  Please let this store be successful enough to stay open, like, forever.  
11.  Please tell me the mall decided it's better to rent all the spaces for less money than before than gouge existing tenants to the point they can't stay open and have a bunch of empty stores again... For decades.
12.  Holiday decorations... Jo-Ann's has cool holiday decor, because, Halloween!
13.  I may start putting up a Christmas tree after a despairing decade without one.
14.  Two words: teacher discount! 
15.  Workshops! 
16.  No oil painting supplies.  Bummer. I'll step up my acrylic painting when I'm not in class each week.
17.  But jewelry supplies. I can rock that! 
18.  Crap. Where am I going to neatly store all the supplies I'll be compelled to buy to make myself feel whole and complete?  Must learn to organize crafts.
19.  Jo-Ann's... Open on Sundays!  ...But God wants me to create.  That's why He made me creative.  
20.  That doesn't mean I'm going to Hell.  Back off!  Isn't it a sin to squander your God-given gifts?  You're just jealous.
21.  OMG... Craft magazines!!  Wal-Mart can bite me!
22.  Is it a sin to say OMG? What if I really mean Oh My Goodness?
23.  I'm acting like people in What's Eating Gilbert Grape? did when Burger Barn came to town.  Lol. Geeking out. 
24. Yeah, but people always want the geek to help them with their stuff.
25.  Oh... Looking into the glass door where construction is going on... It looks like they're taking at least two store footprints for Jo-Ann's.  Maybe three footprints.   Ohh... Squee!  Hey look, there's a ghost in the picture I took.  Weird. Somebody really WAS fatally injured here? 
26.  Still, fun times this summer! Creating makes me happy!
27.  Store opens... August 29th? I'll have been back at work for a solid month!  Oh no... I feel like I'm gonna die...
28.  Mom would have loved having this store in town.  *sigh*
29.  Christmas ornaments! I'm going to be making a LOT of jeweled Christmas ornaments for my tree! I might even sell them.  You know you want some!  I promise, I don't use pipe cleaners.  Lol
30.  I'm gonna make lace snowflakes too.  Yes, I am.  Because they're gorgeous and people love getting them.  
31.  Can I keep my dog from peeing on my Christmas tree?  I've gotta build a little fence to keep him away.
32.  Cake decorating supplies.  Hahaha. Oh yeah.  I was good at cake decorating back in the day.  I just haven't done it in about ten years. Imma make cakes and cupcakes and give them to other people to make them fat and look thinner myself by comparison.  *evil laugh*
33.  It's a whole neeeeewwwww worrrrrllld...... Oh. That must be why Disney never hired me to sing their soundtrack songs.  
34.  Ooh... Cakes decorated with modeling chocolate.  :) I'm on it.  Already know how.  Took the Craftsy class!  (I'm not going into business or anything, but for personal use -- what fun!)
35.  Crates.  Yeah, I know.  Shut up.  They're freaking useful!
36.  I'm not going to have to drive nearly an hour for EVERYTHING anymore.  *relief* Unless this store gives in to the hometown curse and starts major suckage on stocking.  WE ARE NOT INACCESSIBLE TO PLANES, TRAINS, RIVERBOATS, OR TRUCKS, PEOPLE! There's no excuse for continually bare shelves, Wal-Mart!
37.  Scrapbooking supplies!  Which I'll scan and use in my photo books and then craft with the papers. :D
38.  Cricut supplies! I might actually use mine!  Oh... Appliqué shirts! Yup.  
39.  Sewing patterns.  Oh my... No, I'm not making prom dresses.  I'm not a costumer.  Well, not anymore.  ;)  Once upon a time, there was Laundry and Bourbon, and I was allowed to help.  It made me feel very useful, special, and needed, especially since I was never going to be given an actual speaking part in any Vanguard Theater production and it gave me a chance to hang out with my few friends.  :).   Okay, I still collect costume patterns for myself, hoping for the chance someday to wear those costumes.
40.  Hmm... I could do embroidery, with quality thread.
41.  *Must remember to sleep sometime.  

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