Saturday, February 6, 2016

The Water Conundrum

HAren't you proud of my using such a big word? Lately it feels like I have been losing my higher level vocabulary. Actually, lately it feels like I'm losing IQ points. I catch myself thinking about early-onset Alzheimer's.  

In my quest to be thinner before I shop for a wedding dress, I'm drinking lots of water. In all honesty, I have had a case of pitting edema for nearly 20 years, that no doctor will do anything about.  They all blow it off as if I've told them that it's been bothering me for a few days. I am a little bit concerned that it is contributing to a major health problem that I will find out later I should have had taken care of if I wanted to live longer. And I will punch the first medical professional who asks me, "Well why didn't you take care of it before?"

i overheard at a weight-loss clinic that shares space with my chiropractor's office, that 150 ounces of water per day was the magic amount for weight loss. It might just be because that person weighed 150 pounds and was trying to lose some weight, or it may be that they weighed 300 pounds,. I wasn't looking at them. I wasn't really trying to hear them either, but they were about five feet away with only a curtain separating us, and on this occasion I didn't fall asleep face down on the table while I was getting electro-shock therapy on my shoulder and ankle.  

So I did a little research, and found very differing opinions on the matter. I do believe that drinking plenty of water will help the liver to do its job because the kidneys will be able to do theirs solo.  I think that drinking your body weight in water might not be safe, electrolyte wise. However, I have seen lots of research about drinking two thirds of your body weight in water. Let's not discuss exactly how much water that is for me though. 

I have come to some conclusions during this experiment. I figured it wouldn't hurt me to do the experiment and see what happened if I drink lots of water. After all, we need plenty of clean water.

Supposedly, at some undetermined point in the future, drinking lots of water will cause you to lose excess water bloat, which should include my edema.  It's been a week at this attempt, and my edema is just as bad as ever. In fact, my ankles have started swelling. I wore compression socks to work yesterday.  It felt as if I had a low-grade electric massage going on from my knees down. I'm sure that was from the compression pushing the water upwards out of my lower legs.  Last night, I could see my ankle bones again. I was relieved.

I'm wondering if I might ought to wear compression socks more often, while I'm drinking all this water, just to ensure that the water doesn't collect in my lower legs.

I have tried drinking lots of water out of squeeze bottles, water bottles, sippy cups with straws, and even filter bottles. This time, I just grab the glass out of the cabinet, filled it up with water, and started drinking. I found that it's easier for me to drink more water out of a glass then something with a straw or a valve you have to suck the water out of.  That lame advice I got to just sip water all day was absolutely useless. I'd never get enough water into me doing it that way. I have to pretty much gulp the water every time I take a drink, but the good thing is that I can drink about 4 ounces in one drink.

I end up having to go to the bathroom two or three times an hour in this situation, and it makes it really difficult at work. I'm either planning my water consumption to coincide with breaks between classes, or having to hold it a very long time and squirming throughout. I'm definitely keeping the tissue companies in business at this point. My brain tells me that I'm slowly shrinking, but the mirror does not tell me a different story. I look the same. How disappointing.  

I'm scared to step on the scale, because this time last week I did it and I had gained 5 pounds in one day.

5 pounds of water does not make you thinner. It has to go somewhere, and you don't get a nice weight conversion as when you are losing fat and growing muscles.

I was drinking all of that water from 12 ounce glasses, until I found a pint and a half jar in my cabinet. They are great for drinking glasses, because they hold a lot, but still fit well in my small hands. My brain is still trying to empty that glass in four attempts. So in essence, I think I'm drinking 12 ounces, but I'm really drinking 20, and it takes about the same amount of effort.  

I can't force myself to drink enough absolutely plane, filtered water, so I squirt a tiny bit of lemonade MiO into it. It takes the plain water taste off, without being much of a flavor. It's almost like drinking lemon water, but it's more portable than fresh lemons or bottled lemon juice.

Now I'm on my second glass, but instead of having finished 24 ounces of water, I've now finished 40, with about the same amount of effort.  Sometimes it's all in how you trick your brain.  

Supposedly, when you have enough water in your system, the body lets go of the excess that's making you swell.  Welp folks, I'm here to tell you that is not solving the edema problem.  Now I'm waking up with a horrible case of cottonmouth, and let's just say that the lower half of my body is acting like it's dehydrated. Inexplicable.  The autonomic systems are not getting into line and working like a well lubricated machine. *sigh*. It's either confusion due to the sudden wealth of water or its a problem that no amount of water is going to change.

A little bit of bathroom advice, since I brought it up-- the concept of Poo-Pourri spray works, but it's awfully expensive. Just get a cheap bottle of essential oil and drop a couple of drops into the toilet bowl before you go.  I had some old Bath and Body Works room fragrance oil that I didn't like using (I hate burning a candle to warm up a few drops of oil that get all gunky in the diffuser), and it works great.  It also leaves a residual pleasant fragrance in the room instead of the usual.

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